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- Cheating destroys relationships and marriages, and those who have been cheated suffer greatly.
- Our readers, men and women alike, have shared some of their stories with us.
- “I have been scammed many times. I’ve been torn, and I will not trust anyone in my life,” says one reader.
It is heartbreaking to read about relationships and marriages that have suffered from infidelity.
Cheating not only destroys relationships and marriages, but those who have been cheated suffer greatly.
Our readers, men and women alike, have shared some of their stories with us.
READ MORE | “Living away from the love of my life for 14 years left me holding on to false hope”
“I have been scammed many times. I’ve been torn apart and I won’t trust anyone in my life. I don’t think I will ever get over this pain which is excruciating. I was humiliated.”
thinking about divorce
“My husband has been cheating for a while but I never took it seriously until he started making calls in the middle of the night. He told me he couldn’t sleep. He wanted some fresh air outside, never thought about it. He called his girlfriend until I saw his conversation but he still hasn’t confessed. He accused me of touching his phone. At the moment I am considering a divorce.”
READ MORE | Woman seeks closure after partner of 6 years dies amid cheating drama: ‘My heart is bleeding’.
Left with the kids
“I was unemployed and got a job 800 kilometers from home for 14 months. I found out that my wife was having an affair for three months. She walked in and out of motels 21 times. After confronting her with the evidence, she admitted to having an affair. My 17-year marriage couldn’t survive that; that was last month! It’s painful, I feel cheated and she’s undressed! And yes, I stayed behind with children.
In a previous story we did, a reader shared how she was in a long-distance relationship for more than 10 years. It was difficult for her but she hoped her love would last the distance because she still loved her partner. “I felt lonely at times and would call my partner and cry. I felt like he was dating someone else when he didn’t take the calls, and to my surprise, that ended up being true,” she told us.
The two have a seven-year-old child together. “After I was born in 2015, the woman he cheated with called me and abused me, but I refused to do her justice. I pretended not to be hurt, but deep down I was bleeding,” she shared.
READ MORE | Being Cheated Is Painful – Marriage Therapist Explains Why People Take This Destructive Path
The only explanation she received from her child’s father was, “It was a mistake.”
But the trust was broken, and living apart made it difficult even to trust him again.
“From that day on, I never trusted him again. I sometimes cheat just for revenge. I don’t care about his feelings, but we’re still together. He destroyed my trust. I need counseling to be able to love again.”
READ MORE | Cheating and Social Media: Beware of the pitfalls of exposing your unfaithful partner
Life Coach Thembi Hama advised that revenge cheating is often used as a coping mechanism because when you’re deeply hurt, you react out of pain and at first instinct would want to inflict the same type of injury, if not more, on the one who hurt them .
“Although it may be temporary, the new affair seems to take your mind off the pain and feels like payback,” she said. Even if it seems like a way to deal with the pain
Thembi says revenge and deceit could find people in similar situations in complicated love triangles.
They could break the heart, break the heart of someone else, or lose their longtime partner. “They may discover that revenge cheating doesn’t feel as good as they thought, and they may feel a lot worse than before,” she adds.
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In a previous article we published recently, marriage therapist Bakhe Dlamini mentioned what cheating does to people and relationships:
- It destroys the partner’s self-esteem and he begins to doubt himself.
- It drains trust. The partner loses trust and becomes more and more suspicious.
- It leaves the partner with many questions. You wonder, “What happened?” “How did it happen?” “Where did the scam happen?” “Why did it happen?”
- Cheating can result in a partner contracting STIs or pregnancy if the scammer does not use protection.
- It brings pain to the partner – some people who are cheated on get depressed.
- It can end your relationship or marriage.