Dishonest or infidelity is unforgettable, however unforgivable? Celebrities share their perspective

MUMBAI: In a popular TV show that works wonders on screen, the husband has an extramarital affair and leaves his 25-year-old wife for another woman. But as luck would have it, he has an accident and falls in love with his wife while she is taking care of him. He asks for forgiveness and confesses his love, but the woman refuses him. Although cheating or infidelity is something that no one can accept, what if the unbeliever asks for forgiveness, should he be given another chance? We spoke to a couple of celebs about it, and here’s what they had to say:

Ajay Singh Chaudhary: A relationship is based on trust, and when it breaks, the relationship breaks too. So cheating is unforgivable and not at all unacceptable. If the other person is trying to fix things and asking for forgiveness, it has to be real. If we don’t forgive others, if we don’t forgive ourselves, then how will we live a peaceful life because at the end of the day this is what we all strive for. However, you need to be sure that the same mistakes will not be repeated. People confuse forgiveness and forgetting, they don’t forgive, they forget and talk about it again when they want to. But when you have forgiven someone, you need to point out that you are not talking about it as you wish. It has to be genuine from both sides because it takes a long time to rebuild that trust. So when you do, you will be staying true to yourself and your relationship.

Nivedita Basu: When a person is in a relationship or has an extramarital affair, it is unfair to break a relationship unless it is in bad shape. But if someone has unknowingly fallen in love with someone and hasn’t revealed it, that person isn’t all bad because people can cheat on you when it comes to hiding things. If they are families and you love the person and feel that your relationship should be given a second chance, this is what you need to do. But if it’s already been a sour relationship and you haven’t been invested, then it totally depends on the couple whether they want to give a second chance.

Sucheeta Trivedi: Marriage is a man-made institution, so it’s a little unusual because it’s inevitable for a man who is already a monogamist but a polygamist, and has been medically proven to need more than one person sexually , and it is physiologically impossible for women too. For me the whole thing is that you commit yourself and then get married at a later age when your hormones are in place and you are not an infidel. But if you get married at a younger age, your life has just started, you will be attracted to someone other than your husband or wife. So if you get married in your late 30s or early 40s, you’re more sedentary. Extramarital affairs after 50 is a big no, but if it happens before 50 it is understandable and you should forgive your partner.

Kavitta Verma: I read somewhere that a person who chooses another person outside of a relationship was never in love with the first one.

I think this is a very individual point of view. When you forgive someone there is a void forever and it is very likely that it will be taken for granted. Any type of abuse is not worth taking, and cheating is also a type of abuse that breaks you emotionally. This puzzle is a personal choice. If we give a chance, we should be prepared for the effects. Forgiveness is noble, but you should know how much to accept and when to let go, even if it’s someone you love very much.

Pranitaa Pandit: Once a deceiver, always a deceiver. You can never trust the person who cheated on you because that’s not how it works. Be it someone, your husband, your wife, or your girlfriend, that is the fundamental nature of a person. An extramarital affair is a big no again. There are many times people ask for forgiveness and they are forgiven too, but I think even if you forgive them they don’t change because it becomes their habit. It is extremely difficult even when you are young and there are many expectations and emotions at stake, but you should always walk away. Nowadays, especially in marriage, it’s very common, that’s what I’ve seen. A lot of people cheat and are very happy with it. I think they shouldn’t get another chance. But if you have a child with that person then you try to fix things because there is another life.

Aanushka Ramesh: I think cheating and infidelity are unacceptable. I think if you are committed to someone you should be loyal, otherwise you can just be single and date whoever is, as that is everyone’s free choice. I think if someone cheats and then asks for forgiveness, it is the individual’s choice whether to forgive or move on. It would be very difficult and painful to overcome the pain of cheating, but I think if the person is really nice and it is a one-time mistake, on rare occasions they can be forgiven. But if the person is in their nature, or if the circumstances are like that, one should move on. I believe relationships are based on honesty and transparency, so cheating and infidelity are unacceptable.

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