Yes, you broke a marriage vows. But it sounds like you’re ready to work hard to fix the relationship, to look ahead instead of dwelling in the past.
Your husband, on the other hand, keeps you both trapped in an arrangement in which nothing is addressed, nothing overcome, and nothing is resolved. He clearly cares about his family – but he has never processed the betrayal he felt from your betrayal, nor is he able to deal with it in a healthy way. Find a couples therapist you both like to help address the root of the problem.
Dear Anni: My 30-year-old grandson is currently in jail for drug possession and shoplifting. This is one of many drug possession charges he has faced over the past two years, and several trials are due in November.
Although I did everything to support and help him, nothing worked. His behavior has caused me and my daughter a great deal of grief and pain. He stopped talking to me a few months ago and it really hurts me.
I’m at a loss as to what to do right now. I’m going to a counselor who can help.
Dear grieving papa: I am so sorry for your grandson. One of the hardest pills to swallow is that we can’t help people who don’t want to help themselves. Stay close to your daughter and continue to show your unconditional love to your grandson.