DEAR ABBY: I ended my 24-year marriage after learning that my wife had an affair with a married couple for nine years alongside several one-night stands. She also gave me an STI. I’ve been faithful, although I’ll admit it’s difficult to live with.
We disagreed on parenting, finances, health, fitness, diet, religion, politics and more. I worked hard but I was a present and active father attending all the games, concerts and activities and training and tutoring my children in music and arts.
In an effort to help other men deal with the grief of infidelity, divorce, and mental health, I began sharing my experiences on a social media platform. My oldest child has now decided to “write me off” and refuses to talk to me. I’m hurt, but I respect her decision. I will not silence my story as it is a tool of empowerment for other men. Is there a way to build a relationship with this adult child?
— DISAPPOINTED FATHER IN THE MIDDLE WEST
DEAR FATHER: Your daughter may be embarrassed or angry because you publicly refer to her mother as an adulteress. Once grown up she’s willing to admit that there are often two sides to every story, she can fix fences but it won’t happen until she’s ready and you can’t force it.
** ** **
DEAR ABBY: I’ve noticed that so many obituaries leave out where the person worked. Many people have worked in the same places for many years. Colleagues and acquaintances I am sure that I would like to pay tribute to those who have died. By the time they find out, too many times the person is already buried.
My late wife was a nurse for almost 40 years and came into contact with many people. The outpouring of love from family, friends and acquaintances in her social and professional life has been overwhelming and heartfelt. They say when we have memories of our loved ones that touch the lives of others, they live on in our hearts forever.
Guys please don’t let their memories fade. Let families know to include their loved one’s work history in the obituary, especially if they had jobs that involved the public.
— GOOD MEMORY OF OHIO
LOVE TO REMEMBER: Because the obituaries you read in the newspaper are expensive, writers may try to keep them short to save money. However, I am printing your helpful reminder for those who need it.
** ** **
DEAR ABBY: I was wondering, although we call our priests “Father”, can I also call him “Dad”? Why or why not?
— THINKING IN THE WEST
DEAR PONDERING: I put your question to Father Guy Gurath, a longtime friend in the Archdiocese of Milwaukee. He chuckled and told me this was a perennial joke among Catholics who have been known to refer to the vicarage as a “home for unmarried fathers.” (!) He further said the formal answer to your question was no. Calling a priest “Father” is likely to offend some people. He suggests using the correct terms “Father,” “Reverend,” or “Pastor.” Thank you Father Guy.
Comments are closed.