There’s one other sort of infidelity on the market that’s about your cash

This Valentine’s Day, therapists are warning: watch your money and your accounts.

Wendy Barlin, CPA and chief strategist for About Profit, says looks can be deceiving.

“People assume it’s easy for me,” said Barlin. “That’s because I have a CPA license, so I need to know how to handle my money.”

Now at the height of her professional career, Barlin admits that getting to where she is now has been a rocky road.

This street seemed perfect more than 14 years ago when she was happily married. But her then husband was hiding something.

“Just one more night at the tables, just one more night,” said Barlin. “There I am, CPA, a partner in a Los Angeles firm who drives to the casinos at night to pull it out. And I didn’t even know how much he’d amassed to pursue this successful dream.”

That debt, she later learned, amounted to about $ 55,000.

“Ultimately, I was responsible for it and paid out every single dollar myself.”

She has since moved on, remarried, has two children, and is now helping people make smart money decisions, which is often combined with smart relationship decisions.

“This is where the therapist comes in because I don’t always think it’s a divorce appeal. Maybe there is a way out,” said Barlin.

Dr. Richelle Moen is a psychologist, marriage and family therapist, and professor at the University of Minnesota Medical School.

“When you are the first to admit the problem, it gets a lot faster and deeper as you come forward and realize and state that you have a problem,” said Dr. Moen. “The hope is, and I am a marriage and family therapist, that we can find a way to fix it, but both must be incredibly motivated to work on this relationship and commitment to the relationship.”

Dr. Moen has seen it all in her 30 years of consulting.

People hid shopping, addictions, and even child support payments.

“Often times, people wait to get married to talk about budgets and what’s important to them. So what if they have a long-term relationship or marriage and try to find out and tell who is is not what I expected. “

She recommends doing the bills and finances together. And while you cannot change others, you can change yourself. After all, Wendy Barlin did.

“I still struggle with a lot of these decisions every day, but I now have the tools to help my family and me manage our money smarter and be more open and honest with one another so that there are no surprises,” said Barlin .

Your best advice now? Have three accounts with your partner. A “your”, “my” and “our” and bring all secrets to the table.

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