The topic of marital infidelity continues to be the focus of attention this week as we received a lot of feedback on last week’s article. The feedback indicates that the majority of married couples will avoid infidelity at all costs. This is because they hate its consequences, especially the wives. So I decided to consider other ways to keep the beast of marital infidelity at bay. I believe that this problem of marital infidelity deserves the necessary attention because of its devastating consequences for the institution of marriage in particular and for society in general. The aftermath of physical harm, emotional trauma, murder, suicide and others are better imagined than experienced. These leave a bitter taste in the mouth that must be avoided. So we should spare no effort in dealing with infidelity. Finally, the truth is that without fire there is no smoke (except in spiritual cases). What I mean is that we should curtail infidelity in dealing with the consequences enumerated above.
Other ways to avoid infidelity
Ensure couples enjoy great intimacy. This means that pairs like the snail and its shell must be, or as it is popularly expressed figuratively, “five and six”. When that level of intimacy is achieved, infidelity becomes nearly impossible. This is achievable through daily renewal of the marital commitment. Marriage requires daily commitment if it is to withstand life’s challenges. This commitment is renewable through verbal and attitudinal means toward oneself and in relationships with others. Leave no doubt in the hearts of men that your hearts belong to one another. In my marriage, friends and relatives from different areas know that we are both “love and honey” and it is difficult to successfully step against or between us. It’s a commitment that has kept invaders at bay. We are one as husband and wife.
Create an Atmosphere in Your Marriage for a Great Sex Life One of the purposes of marriage is to satisfy the need for sexual gratification. This is crucial to the health of a marriage. With sexual gratification, the temptation to be unfaithful becomes nearly impossible, if not downright impossible. That’s why a couple with a great sex life can overcome any challenge. It is an exercise for the mind, soul and body that brings couples together. Let your spouse become your only sex partner while making sex an adventure in your marriage, especially the men who seem to be more adventurous when it comes to sex. My book Enjoying Great Sex Life is a masterpiece about such adventurous sex. The unfortunate reality is that spouses are more susceptible to flirting and sexual advances from others when their sex lives at home are unhappy. According to the author of 101 Marriage Secrets, “close your heart to flirtatious and sexual advances.” That is, it is not on the menu in your heart: no deliberation, no thought, no attempt to see if anyone is guiding you about infidelity. Don’t smell what you’re not eating, or as a tribal adage goes, “Don’t look in the bush lest you see shit.” Set boundaries in your relationships, male or female, that you will never cross, to avoid infidelity to avoid. For example, do not be in the company of people who discuss sexual escapades with anyone other than their spouse. Also, don’t discuss your spouse’s sexual activities with others, especially their weaknesses or “hot spots.” This is private and needs to be made as private as possible. If someone questions your boundaries, explain to him or her that you and your spouse are committed to protecting your marriage and have chosen those boundaries.
Spot Signs of Infidelity Quickly and Flee From It: In many cases, the first step in the infidelity journey begins with people regularly sharing intimate personal information without confiding in their spouse. You and your spouse must be committed to keeping your marriage safe and have chosen those boundaries.
Quickly spot signals of infidelity and flee from them. In many cases, the first step in the infidelity journey begins with people sharing intimate personal information with people of the opposite sex. This could be misconstrued as a sense of intimacy, and keeping it secret encourages the growth of that intimacy.
Other warning signs are as follows
*An increased excitement, especially seeing or meeting someone of the opposite sex.
* Being alone in remote places with a person of the opposite sex; * Drinking alcohol when your spouse is absent, particularly because of marital conflict, and you feel vulnerable because of feelings of loneliness, rejection, or anger towards your spouse.
* Be open in your marriage to all questions of your life together. This is best done when you and your spouse are open about what you can do to avoid an affair. Talking about how to keep your marriage strong will give you strength to prevent an affair. It’s also important that you commit to letting each other know when you’re feeling vulnerable or when a situation has the potential to turn in a direction that could spiral out of control. However, this must be managed in a way that does not make a spouse jealous or feel inappropriate or threatened.
The list of things to do to keep your marriage free from infidelity is truly endless. Each couple must therefore consider what should work for them based on the knowledge of the other that is available to them. That said, normally each partner should be aware of what his or her partner’s red light may be and do whatever they can to protect him or her. May we overcome this monster called infidelity in our marriages.
YOU MAY HAVE COPIES OF MY BOOKS ENJOY GREAT SEX LIFE AND HOW TO HELP YOUR WIFE ENJOY SEX. CONTACT 08112658560 FOR DETAILS.
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